# Tôi / bạn: I / you (neutral) in Vietnamese (A1)

> Tôi is the neutral "I": it says nothing about age, and it keeps a polite distance.

Source: https://vietnamesebuddy.com/grammar/toi-i/ · Updated 2026-11-09

**I / you (neutral)**

Pattern: `tôi · bạn · các bạn`

Level: A1 (our estimate) · Register: everyday

Typed without accents: toi, ban

Saigon: tôi; tui | Hà Nội: tôi

*Tôi* is the neutral "I": it says nothing about age, and it keeps a polite distance. That makes it right for formal settings, at an office counter, with a stranger whose age you can't place, in speeches and in writing. *Bạn* (literally "friend") is the neutral "you": for people your own age, in classrooms, and in writing for the public, such as ads and websites. *Các bạn* is "you all".

Between people who know each other, though, both can sound cold. With someone older, *tôi* can sound stiff or even rude, as if you're refusing the relationship; say *em* or *con* instead. *Bạn* to someone clearly older sounds odd too: use *anh*, *chị*, *cô* or *chú*.

Saigon speakers also say *tui*, and write it in messages. It's casual and friendly, for people you're at ease with: *Tui cũng vậy.* Me too. In Hà Nội it stays *tôi*.

When you don't know the person's age and the setting is polite, *tôi* is safe. Once you know who's older, switch to the family words.

## A common mistake

✗ Chị ơi, bạn có khỏe không?

✓ Chị ơi, chị có khỏe không?

*Bạn* is for people your own age. To a woman a little older than you, say *chị*.

## Examples

- Xin lỗi, tôi không hiểu. — Sorry, I don't understand.
- Tôi muốn mở tài khoản ngân hàng. — I'd like to open a bank account.
- Bạn tên là gì? — What's your name?
- Saigon: Tui cũng thích ăn cay. | Hà Nội: Tôi cũng thích ăn cay. — I like spicy food too.
- Chào các bạn! — Hi, everyone!

## Words in this pattern

- [bạn](https://vietnamesebuddy.com/words/ban-friend/#lx_ban): you
- [tôi](https://vietnamesebuddy.com/words/toi-i/#s_toi_i): I (neutral)

## Compare

- [You and I are family words: anh, chị, em, cô, chú, ba / mẹ and con, thầy / cô and em](https://vietnamesebuddy.com/grammar/address-kinship/): address by age and relationship
- [mình: friendly I, we with you, and oneself](https://vietnamesebuddy.com/grammar/minh-i-we/): I (friendly) / we / oneself
- [Casual I and you between friends: tui – ông / bà, tao – mày, tớ – cậu](https://vietnamesebuddy.com/grammar/tao-may/): I – you (very familiar)

Previous in Talking to and about people: [mình: friendly I, we with you, and oneself](https://vietnamesebuddy.com/grammar/minh-i-we/)
Next in Talking to and about people: [We without you, we with you: chúng tôi, chúng ta](https://vietnamesebuddy.com/grammar/chung-toi-ta/)

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